can anyone find me that ashley tisdale nakkid photo, ive looked everywhere and i cant find it worth shit.Its not for me its for this chick im trying to score with.;)

What does it say about them?

YEP i swore itd never happen again but it did.....Fucking blew an engine on this one....What am i talking about ur wondering? I lost all my chips that i had in on this girl, just got straight up killed a bit ago.....Quick rundown of the whole situation..alot of people this is going on with too recently/

Met a girl, did seriously work, she vibed me(ditching out hanging with her friends to hang with me, not even questioning or stalling out when it came to making plans for a date)...went out 2 days in a row...went to 2 movies..such and such forth. I never put a move on her cause i wasnt feeling her..just wasnt cause it was like i was talking/being around a robot i just did too much work and she was just too blank..it felt like me 95% effort and her 5%....Because i didnt make a move...done for...paid for it..just got my final notice today...2 weeks ago she stopped responding pretty much, she use to talk to me minimally at least once a day(thats her contacting me not me saying anything to her) that fizzled out, no more texts, no more calls, not even responding to my messages online anymore...so its -1 off the list

So if ur in a current situation with a girl..starting off fresh...just DO WORK regardless...whether or not u think its wrong or the right time to make a move...u gotta stomp out the shit or ull end up losing a girl that could be seriously interested in you and or a really descent girl

/rant

Also i may have lost one but i gained 2....but still i chastise myself a bit but like they say dont write it off as a failure but a lesson learned....So thats what i took it down for even tho lookin at the situation at a whole, its fucking terrible.....Just letting you know it can happen no matter how good u think u are with a female...Just peaked and crashed like the stock market within 1 week..no lie.

So a girl stayed over for two nights. We didn't have much sex, maybe 7 times, and like 3ish-4 hours worth. But the last two times I started getting soft. Not like...flippy floppy soft. But not rock hard, and I like to aim for certain areas to thrust towards, when your dicks floppy it makes t hard because it bends. So we stopped having sex.

Things to rule out:

A. Me being gay,
B. Me not being able to perform period (The night before I gave her multiplies)
C. Her not turning me on (she's fucking INCREDIBLE in bed, and hot).

So here's my only two theories:

A. I have HARDCORE anxiety lately and take a shitload of valium/xanax. The night night I preformed really really well I had taken them, but I hadn't taken them for the two times that I went soft (performance anxiety?)

B. I took my antipsychotic Zyprexa (Olanzapine) about 1 hour before having sex with her the last two times.

Help needed. I'm a sexual person and sex > everything. She's super understanding and says we'll work through it. But its humiliating. So if it happens a few more times I'm gonna bail on on the relationship.

Many remember my post from a few days ago which is still going. Well fuck it. I'm back! A friend showed me a good time. I called him up and found out he had an extra ticket to Ozzfest! I got drunk, got stoned, rocked on, and got a BJ from a hot chick. I owe my friend, he fucking saved my life. I got the bank situation fixed, I got my money back, and I have distanced myself from my dad.

Goodnight all, I'm about to pass out and not wake up till noon.

I'm in a bit of a fix. I'm 17, in my last year of high-school and haven't had sex with my current girlfriend. We have mucked around and stuff but as soon as I ejaculate we're both really careful.

But she's 6 days late for her period. She only told me yesterday, and it got me pretty scared. Logically I know she shouldn't be, but I guess there is a chance.

So I bought some pregnancy tests, and she'll use one tomorrow. But my question is about pennyroyal tea. Supposedly if you use fresh pennyroyal leaves and some other herbs, it cleanses the uterus or something like that. Please correct me if I'm wrong.

So has anyone experienced or does anyone have knowledge about this and whether it will work to kill whatever cells are forming there?

Thanks, I'm shitting my pants right now.

Temple, just hear me out. I met a girl recently at the County Fair, lemme tell you about her.
She is attractive.
She speaks her mind.
She doesn't care about what others think.
She has an awkward sense of humor.
Out of those four things, I am all except attractive (I'm slightly overweight). She didn't seem to mind, though. She dresses in black, lives with her friends( she moves between their houses alot), listens to the same music I do (Marilyn Manson, Metallica), plus she can play one of my favorite Metallica song on Guitar (Enter Sandman), pretty much watches the same TV shows as I do. There's nothing about her I don't like. Her name is Emilee(ie? y? not sure). Normally, I am a completely bashful pushover, but I felt perfectly comfortable talking with her. I actually might be getting more confident. The county fair was in a town 40 minutes bike ride there and back, and she is currently living in the town in the other direction, a 60 minute bike ride there and back. There is only one problem, though, she is 18 and a half, I am 15 and a half. Thanks for reading, if you have any advice, please lemme know.

NEWSFLASH

Unwyred & I have planned a meet-up for August! It will be freakin' epic. We actually first encountered one another on totse in a thread about the photo gallery. you may have been bothered by us in threads such as -
showt...69#post8454669

He will be traveling for 31 hours on a plane from the states to come here to New Zealand. We will keep you posted with photos and fuckloads of bragging about THE BEST TOTSE MEET UP IN HISTORY and my 18th birthday whether you like it or not.

EPIC

Thats how far I am away from her.
I Just moved.
Right after I confessed my love to her.
Il never see her again.
So many regrets.

So my friend here on the base is getting divorced and it's really sad.:( She and her husband have been married for 13 years and they have 5 children and he's leaving her for another woman. She's been crying every day for the past week and I just don't know what to say to her. I've been bringing her cookies and stuff and inviting her over to my house, but nothing seems to lessen her pain. What's really strange is they seemed so happy together, but now she's been telling me all of this bad stuff that was happening in their marraige that I never would've guessed. Worse yet all of her other "friends" are shunning her as if her divorce is contagious or something.

So does anyone here have experience with this sort of thing? Is there anything I should do/shouldn't do for her?

...over tha interwebz.

heh. Yeah. I knew that would get your attention...

Sooo... like most of the twenty bajillion other idiots on here, I have a problem. Not surprisingly, this being S&A, this problem involves a friend, and her genitalia.

She's a fascinating girl, and a classic product of moderate to severe neglect... okay, severe neglect. It'd be really, really easy to write her off as a complete blinking idiot if you talk to her, but I've never seen anyone seriously light the fuck up the way she did when one of her questions led to a discussion of electromagnetic and nuclear theory, and she's really fucking quick... but most of her actual learning opportunities... or even human interaction... amounts to the hip-hop her older sister's boyfriends are playing, and that's about it. Fucked up, really...

One of the side effects of this is that the entirety of the sex education she's recieved came from the guy that raped her when she was in second grade. As he was a remarkable dumbfuck even for a kiddie rapist in the ghetto, you can imagine how inadequate this is.

...we've covered some of the things she didn't know - that a clitoris exists, what a clitoris is, that there is a urethera somewhere between it and the vaginal opening rather than just peeing out of the whole damn thing, and a few of the physical changes that have happened between second grade and now, but... she seriously did not know any of these things... at all... and is probably missing a whole lot more.

Incidentally, she's a very sexually driven girl, and despite the suggestion to rub around the top of the v of the joining of her labia until something feels different, well... she's known that a clitoris exists for about 36 hours, but still doesn't know where to find one. Or what to do with it if she does.

...which brings me to my question. This strikes me as, well, horrifically unfair to the girl, and I feel it only a sense of justice that this and a few other inadequacies in her formative educational experience be rectified. 'n no, sadly the showerhead does not detach on the end of a hose, it's fixed into the wall.

So, &totse, here is my question to you. Since I'm nowhere near this girl - how the hell do you teach a girl how to masturbate over the god-damn intarwebz? How do you teach someone to find their clit when they poked around for it and cannot find it? Thoughts? Tips? Suggestions? This poor deprived girl needs your help!

...I now await the opportunity to pick the gems out of the reams of highly-entertaining trolling. Don't let me down, &totse.

I'm still a virgin, and so is my girl friend.

in a few weeks, I'm going to stay at her place for a few days basically, we will be fucking like rabbits.

the problem is that I don't know what position would be best for us and I don't know what to expect.

totse, let be bathe in your eternal wisdom.

because of a urinary tract infection.... will they be able to find out if I've popped my cherry from that?


because my mom can NOT find this stuff out. But I may have to go to the doctors. And I don't want to sit here miserable, but if it's that or my mom finding out I've been like, with girls...
i'd stay miserable.


agh help.

My girlfriend and I have been going out for around 6 months and sleeping together for most of them. She is 16, I am 18, she is a real nympho but not too slutty about it which I love. Recently however her brother found out and informed their parents. Her parents are very, very religious. They are also aware that I simply abhor christianity. Since they found out we have been limited to weekend visits during the day in a supervised environment. She has been pretty much locked up in another room so she cant sneak out any more. Her mum is the only one who will talk to me, and her brother has threatened to set loose a recently liberated convict on me. Everything is pretty much fucked up, she isn't even allowed to go anywhere that I might be without supervision.

Esteemed totse community, does anyone have any experience with this type of thing? If I could loosen her parents up a bit, or sneak her out or even see her more often so that we might bask in one anothers company. Anything would beat this.

On a side note this afternoon she snuck away from gym to see me for an hour, during this time I believe she may have swallowed my penis piercing, she isn't too sure what happened but it's gone. At the moment I have a paperclip through it instead, is this dangerous? X

Could it work as an excuse for conversation? Ever? If not, exactly how bad of an idea is this and why? I think it could work in some situations. I think a lot of people appreciate emotional straightforwardness on some level, though still feel the need to hold you personally accountable for your words and actions. Since in college drunkenness socially excuses pretty much everything short of rape and murder, you could potentially express yourself with retard level tact and have only the implications of your actions be considered.

I'm kinda tired and probably not thinking clearly but it seems like a pretty good idea right now. Thoughts?